Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Today in Awful Warseer Tactics Part 3

Oh, hello.

It's time for another dose of the horrible, horrible advice people receive on Warseer.  Today's thread is a real winner.  The original posters asks how his Warriors of Chaos army can cope with his buddy's Skaven army.  In particular he has no answer that he can conceive of to deal with Hell Pit Abominations.  Let's go to the thread, shall we?  My comments will be in orange.


Bishamon_o: so i was playing against a friend of mine a while back, he plays skaven, and he brought his hellpit abomination.it all went well until he charged the HPA into my warriors, my attacks bounced of his toughness and regen, and he killed 15 of em, i failed theyre leadership test ( they were stuborn, but if you roll 11 it doesnt matter much)  after that i tried to kill it but most things i threw aginst it didnt quite cut it.  now ive heard from pretty much everyone is that the key to killing the HPA is to use flameing attacks ( duh, like i didnt know that myself).  the problem is how to deliver said attacks to the beasty.  because the chances of killing it before it attacks me arent that high, and the points cost of my units that can possibly take him on mean that if he gets the chance to attack back, he'll get his points back at least.  another problem i had trying to figure out a counter measure, is how do i catch the damn thing, with pretty much my entire army consisting of big blocks of infantry, im haveing troubles finding a way to even get to the damn thing ( with its random movement in every direction it wants) so if anyone could give me some usefull tips for dealing with the monstrosity, theyd be very welcome 

A couple of things.  First, why are your warrior's attacks bouncing off of him?  You are using halberds, right?  If not, you should be.  Str5 is the key to making warriors at all useful offensively.  Second, why are you running warriors in units bigger than 12?  That's fail right there.  Warriors should be, at most, 6 wide and 2 deep.  They are too expensive to pay 80 points for +1 combat resolution from a rank.   12 Khorne Warriors with halberds against a Hellpit should make 24 attacks.  18 hit.  9 wound.  Fails 4 regeneration saves.  Still alive but hurting.  Add the Flaming banner, which every army should have at least one of somewhere and he is outright dead.  That's the easy way to deal with it.  I can get into complicated tactics like using Marauder Horsemen as bait to get him where you need him to be for your flaming attack troops to come into play.  Warriors of Chaos don't get flaming attacks anywhere else except magic, and you aren't going to kill it with magic reliably.  So now that I've told you the correct answer, let's see what the pin heads have to say.

Kevlar: Chaos knights with flaming attack banner should make short work of him.

Except magic swords don't get the flaming banner.  Try again.

Witchblade: Flickering fire is always nice.

Wrong, dumbass.  Flickering Fire typically does 4 strength 4 hits.  That will reliably do 1 or 2 wounds at most, per turn.  That is not an efficient way to kill a 6 wound creature your opponent brings two of.

eyescrossed: The flaming banner will only work if you buy lances for the knights. 

True, and since lances blow, that is a horrible tactic that borders on list tailoring.

The_Varangian: not directly relating to this, but a dwarf runelord with flaming atacks, always wounding on a 2+ and with some other runes works really well. bretonnian lords on pegasus work well aswell. 

At least you admit you are derailing the thread completely.  No one gives a squirt of piss about your Dwarf Lord or Brettonian lord in this thread.  And you know that.  You admit as much.  Yet you STILL need that +1 so you contribute jack and shit.

Mulletron: a slightly more costly measure you could go for a tzeentch lord. Put it on a disc to help makle sure you get into combat and hellfire sword to negate the regen and then multiplying each wound caused by d3 could be enough to take it down in one turn (with a bit of luck).
Except the Hellfire Sword is bad bad bad.  It's too expensive and isn't very good against all comers.  Don't encourage list tailoring as a solution.  That is the mark of a weak minded player.  The flaming banner is is worth taking because it will be useful against a wide range of opponents.   A Tzeentch Lord on Disc is a good idea for a Chaos list.  With the Hellfire Sword is just bad gearing.

russellmoo:  Easiest would be to have your wizard take lore of fire-

Except Lore of Fire is shitty.

Hammerwar: I'm not so sue; ensorcelled weapons are MAGICAL weapons, whereas flaming attacks doesn't work on models' MAGIC weapons. It seems the suffix '-AL' on the knights' weapons may differentiate the two but perhaps observing this is excessive pedantry. So I'm not sure. 
Oh, fuck you.  FUCK YOU.  That is the most horrible example of RAW-ing I've ever heard.  You're damn right its excessive pedantry.  If you draw that distinction I'll say that their swords don't hurt Ethereal units.  Die in a fire.
Chaos Undecided: Of course a Lore of Fire caster can do the same job even if taking one doesnt seem in fashion these days, question is would you over roll the number of dice to try and get the irresistible force at that crucial moment is it worth potentially blowing up your caster to kill off the abomination

That's because Lore of Fire sucks, as I said before.  And thanks for explaining how Irresistible Force works and how to use strategy to determine how many dice to throw.  You're breaking new ground.

Da Black Gobbo: What about a lord with the sword that causes 1d3+1 wounds and counts as flaming?

That was already suggested.  You fail.

You Pale Companion: Tzeentch chaos lord on disc with that fire sword which does D3+1 wounds and some protection with the spare points.
But only use it when you are sure he will bring at least one HPA.Or at least something big you can kill.

More list tailoring advice from really stupid people.  And an idea that is bad being suggested for the third time.

Kevlar: Give it to a demon prince. He gets a free 5+ ward and wings.

You're the same idiot who suggested Flaming Banner on Knights.  And now you suggest giving equipment to Daemon Princes, which the army book does not allow.  You can stop posting your idiocy anytime now.

Rakton:  how about 15 flaming khorne warriors with halbs? only 305 points although not as competetive as nurgle can do some damage to that hellpit. 
Ding ding ding.  Nearly the correct answer.  You only need 12 warriors, but OK fine.  You fail by suggesting that Nurgle is "more competitive" since Nurgle is arguably the worst mark in the book.  But this should end the thread right?  Never is it so easy...

Rabid Bunny 666: Hellcannon: Hit the unit next to it, its not immune to panic and its only LD 5 IIRC. Why fight it when you can send it running?

The HPA is leadership 8.  Fail advice.

Exodus2013:  I'd say Dwarf cannons with the Rune of Fire would work better then anything else though but this obviously isn't an option for a WoC player :P.

This post shouldn't need an explanation of how awful it is.

PeG:sorceror without any mark, death magic should have some tools to deal with both the abomination and some other nasty models you might face. 

At least you didn't recommend Lore of Fire.  But your idea is still pretty merit-less. 

After this, the thread degenerates into talking about how Goblin armies can deal with it, and more pedantic debate about the difference between Magic Weapons and Magical Weapons and the Flaming Banner.  I'm not sure the OP ever got his question answered satisfactorily, but that should be expected when you ask the dumbest players in the game to help you solve your problems.


  1. I wish I could laugh more. I don't play WHFB, but I get the point pretty easily.

    Did you send the dude an email?

  2. Thoroughly enjoyed that - I learned something today...